The
ordinary mistake that is made by novelists, poets, and essayists
about the good human being is to make him to be like him. The
individual's own wishes for perfection and his guilt and shame
about shortcomings are projected upon various kinds of people
from whom the average man demands much more than he himself gives.
Thus teachers and ministers are ordinarily conceived to be rather
joyless people who have no mundane desires and who have no weaknesses.
It is my belief that most of the novelists who have attempted
to portray good (healthy) people did this sort of thing, making
them into stuffed shirts or marionettes or unreal projections
of unreal ideals, rather than into the robust, hearty, lusty individuals
they really are. Our subjects show many of the lesser human failings-if
they are in fact failings. (They too are equipped with silly,
wasteful, or thoughtless habits. They can be boring, stubborn,
irritating. They are by no means free from a rather superficial
vanity, pride, partiality to their own productions, family, friends,
and children.)
Our
subjects are occasionally capable of an extraordinary and unexpected
ruthlessness. It must be remembered that they are very strong
people. This makes it possible for them to display a surgical
coldness when this is called for, beyond the power of the average
man. The man who found that a long-trusted acquaintance was dishonest
cut himself off from this friendship sharply and abruptly and
without any pangs whatsoever. Another woman who was married to
someone she did not love, when she decided on divorce, did it
with a decisiveness that looked almost like ruthlessness. Some
of them recover so quickly from the death of people close to them
as to seem heartless.
Not
only are these people strong but they are also independent of
the opinions of other people. One woman, extremely irritated by
the stuffy conventionalism of some individuals she was introduced
to at a gathering, went far out of her way to shock these people
by her language and behavior. One might say that it was all right
for her to react to irritation in this way, but another result
was that these people were completely hostile not only to the
woman but to the friends in whose home this meeting took place.
While our subject wanted to alienate these people, the host and
hostess definitely did not.
We
may mention one more example which arises primarily from the absorption
of our subjects in an impersonal world. In their concentration,
in their fascinated interest, in their intense concentration on
some phenomenon or question, they may become absent-minded or
humorless and forget their ordinary social politeness. In such
circumstances, they are apt to show themselves more clearly as
essentially not interested in chatting, gay conversation, party-going,
or the like. They may use language or behavior which may be very
distressing, shocking, insulting, or hurtful to others. Other
undesirable (at least from the point of view of others) consequences
of detachment have been listed above.
Even
their kindness can lead them into mistakes, e.g., marrying out
of pity, getting too closely involved with neurotics, bores, unhappy
people, and then being sorry for it, allowing scoundrels to impose
on them for awhile, giving more than they demand so that occasionally
they encourage parasites and psychopaths, etc.
Finally,
it has already been pointed out that these people are not free
of guilt, anxiety, sadness, self-castigation, internal strife,
and conflict. The fact that these arise out of non-neurotic sources
is of little consequence to most people today (even to most psychologists),
who are therefore apt to think them unhealthy for this reason.